This has been the most interesting week. So many events happened with synchronicity! Evan has been very very busy. Every night since he transitioned to the Other Side I listen to our archived radio shows to hear his voice. Well, that was why I first did it in the days following his passing-today it’s also […]
Month: April 2014
Grief. It’s a horrid bedfellow. Following you around, sitting where you sit, interrupting happy moments-tapping you on the shoulder to remind you it’s still around and must be acknowledged like a needy stray dog. I’d rather have the needy stray dog. It tries to rob you of your peace and any tranquil moment is almost […]
In the days following Evan’s passing he began sending me (and thousands of you) signs that he was around and happy. A lot of great songs he sent really helped me deal with this loss. One of them was “Happy” by Pharrell Williams. Every time it comes on I can see him doing his silly […]
This week I had the absolute joy of going to watch VoicePlay in Mount Dora. For those not familiar with them they are an entirely acapella group-5 guys. 2 of them worked in the BeetleJuice show with Evan for many years. This was the first time I saw Geoff (Frankenstein) and Tony (Dracula) since Evan passed […]
We go through life. Some things feel SO good to us and we run toward them. Some feel not so good and we hi-tail it out of there as fast as we can! This keeps us from getting ourselves into situations that aren’t going to turn out well for us. This is a good thing! […]
When I was a kid I hated rainy days. Well most of the time, unless they got me out of something like yard work. As an adult rainy days usually bring a feeling of calm and yet a bit of sadness. Not sure why. Today it’s raining and I feel very calm and a little […]
Had a busy day yesterday. It was my daughter, Jaden’s 15th birthday. It was a beautiful day. When I woke up and realized it was Sunday I instantly felt sad. As you know Sunday was my favorite day of the week when Evan was alive. Within a few seconds the song “She Keeps Me Warm” […]
Its funny when you lose someone how the little things you never really paid much attention to become paramount. Huge. Like the different days of the week. I can relate each day to something I shared with Evan. Monday. His day off. He was always at my place because he’d stay after we did the […]
In just 39 days I’ve learned so much about grief and it’s living, breathing process. It’s ALWAYS there like a rude friend that won’t take no for an answer. It sits beside you and walks with you everywhere you go. Grief is a dick. But like anything hard and painful it’s here to teach you. […]
People tell you a lot of things when someone close to you dies. They have the best of intentions-I have no doubt about that, but everyone’s experience is different. I’ve learned that these past 38 days. Can you ever be ready for such a horrific event? Can you prepare to watch the one person you […]
I remember that morning very well. Evan and I had been dating (not exclusively but getting to know eachother) about a month. He looks at me and says “I have to tell you something & you’re not going to like it” All kinds of things raced through my head but I said, “Ok. What.” He […]
Evan had a sweet tooth. No, seriously this one required intervention. Every time I’d show up at his place and actually any time he showed up at mine he’d have this little plastic bag from Universal Studios (where he worked). Like most things with Evan this little bag had a ritual. He’d pull it out […]
So Evan had a LOT of friends and people he loved over the years. A lot. As a 15 year veteran Special Effects Make-up artist at Universal Studios (some was him as SpiderMan haha) he has a huge network of people that love him. BUT after Evan passed I was astounded at the outpouring of […]
That first night-hell the whole first couple of weeks are a blur. I’d just passed my 90 days as a non-smoker the day Evan passed. He was pretty darn proud of me as I was of myself. But that night someone pressed a pack into my hand (grateful for that actually) and I smoked-a lot. […]
35 days. So many times the passing of a month meant very little to me. Rushed through with so much to do. But not this time. 35 days that have changed my life so profoundly that I’m not even sure who I was before. Was I happier? On the surface I’d say yes without thinking […]
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